A waiting time

Tuesday was one of those surreal days when the usual routines are put on hold and breathing needs to be remembered. A family member required some surgery on a limb after a sports injury.

Tight time keeping was the focus of the day’s beginnings to ensure all instructions were followed and check-in was completed.

Time then ballooned out into waiting, waiting, waiting. The clock was watched and minds wondered about the call to the operating theatre and when that would come.

That point of hugs, whispered words and a long ride away down a long corridor came. For the support crew time again slowed as calculations were made and fears were encouraged to quieten.

A walk in the hospital grounds had some appeal to help reduce the feeling of simply hanging around,

to search out some light and colour,

and to try sitting patiently in nature.

Shadows threatened to seep in again

but here were reminders of just how many hands were reaching out to help

and fingers skilled at repairing and healing were working for the best.

Relief flooded us all with the patient’s return and with a positive report.
Perspectives cleared with focus returning to a more outward view.

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Timesick

I was reading a blog post the other day and the woman described herself as “time-sick”. What did she mean by this? Well the feeling she experienced in her being was the same aching we might feel when we are “home-sick”. That yearning ache to be back in our own familiar house, environment, culture, society, homeland.

Time-sick was more about leaving a period of time behind or reflecting on past times and missing the familiar things and people. I liked the term time-sick as it seemed to capture some of the feelings I had been experiencing in the past few days.

I have been reflecting on better times. Times when employment was less frustrating, more productive and more financially rewarding. I have been reflecting on busier times when my role was more defined and when my plans were being fulfilled. And I have felt the tug of yearning so similar to homesickness.

Change is the a certainty we live with and we are called to adapt to it at an increased pace right now. Or at least that is how it feels.

It is important to acknowledge the feelings that arise but also important to heed the wisdom of Heraclitus when he said

“No man ever steps in the same river twice; for it’s not the same river and he’s not the same man.”

It is about finding new ways forward, building on the past. Seeking new solutions to new challenges.

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Regroup time

Yesterday I blogged about the importance of time to yourself after I witnessed a checkout operator describing her enjoyment of a morning to herself. I can see some hours today which are already labelled “time to myself” and I am really looking forward to those.

As I was thinking about the regenerative nature of a chunk of unpressured time to ourselves, I also thought about how all human beings, no matter their age need “regroup time”. A transition space where they allow time and often personal space to shift from one activity or focus to another. I am very aware of this in my own family as the adults come in from work and often settle with a newspaper or magazine while they regroup from the pressures of work, the drive home and a shift into more leisurely time in the evening.

School children benefit from regroup time as they shift from the demands of the school routine, learning, noisy groups of friends and any personal challenges of the day. A slow drift home on foot is ideal, some food and water when they arrive home, and time outdoors just mucking around allows them to restore so many aspects of their being.

I noticed my two year old grandson needed some regroup time when he woke up from his midday sleep recently. He was happy to sit on my knee and allow me to cuddle him but apart from that he just needed regroup time to shift back into full of energy and movement mode.

No doubt neuroscience could explain what happens to our brains and why we need regroup time but for now we simply need to care for ourselves and our children by providing this important part of being human.

Time to myself

At the supermarket today I heard the checkout operator say to the woman packing my groceries that she had not started work until noon today and just how much she had enjoyed having time to herself.

She went on to describe what she had done in the morning and how good it had felt to slow down, to go at her own pace without the usual constraints of time and work; to think about things that mattered just to her and to really enjoy having lunch with her daughter in a lovely location.

She sounded and looked very relaxed and refreshed from having some time to herself. I felt more relaxed too as she described the benefits she had felt.

I hope you can find that same “me” time too.

More fun ideas

My informal research about what women did to play and have fun also included the following:

Soaking in a bath

Playing with collections of dolls and teddies

Writing anything “non heavy” e.g emails to friends, letters to family

Coffee and chocolate

Repartee and friendships with work colleagues

Professional development, learning and the anticipation related to new challenges in those areas

Playing with ideas, opinions, viewpoints and words

Pottering about on a musical instrument

Sitting in the sun

Having breakfast in bed

Watching early morning television

Christmas time, visiting Santa’s Cave and specialty areas in shops

Imaginary stories, fairies etc

Gardening and baking = thinking time while doing things

Craft and creative activities

Playing with crayons, pastels and colours

Playing with spiritual “tools” – meditation, Reiki, visualisations

Finding time, taking time and giving themselves permission to do any or all of these nourishing activities were the biggest obstacles to increasing fun and play in the women’s lives.